What I Know To Be True About Myself

Don Blackwell — who is well-known in the eating disorder community and who is affectionately called “Twitter Dad” by more than one of us — gave us all a homework assignment a few nights ago.

Take out a piece of paper and at the top of it write, “What I Know To Be True About Myself.” Then list all of the positive attributes (non-physical) of your authentic self.

There is a wisdom to this practice that goes beyond simply being your own cheerleader. It is meant to serve you in moments when your very self is at stake. You may in a situation where another person is bullying or attacking you. You may be in the throes of an eating disorder and are being assaulted by the abusive voice in your head.

Whatever the situation, these are the moments that you need to have a solid sense of who you truly are, or else you may find yourself in danger of believing the abuser or the bully.

I made a list of my own a few days ago, so I’m going out on a limb and posting it here. The reticent part of me didn’t (doesn’t) want to have it here, but the part of me that is embracing the new, recovered self realizes that putting it out there can be another way to practice affirming who I know I am and disregarding anything that doesn’t resonate with it.

So — want to know who I am? I’ll tell you.

What I Know To Be True About Myself

I am kind — No matter the outcome, my intentions behind my words and actions by and large are good. When I offend or hurt someone, I don’t need I get lost in guilt, because I know I don’t mean to cause harm.

I am intelligent — I have a powerful mind that can take on complex and seemingly hopeless quandaries.

I am strong — No matter how many people tell me I’m weak, or fragile, or passive, or tentative, or overly sensitive, I know that I’m wickedly resilient, and have endured and surmounted hardships that others would crumble under.

I am not perfect — I mess up, I say the wrong things, and at times I respond inappropriately to situations. But then, I never promised perfection anyway.

I feel deeply — And there’s nothing wrong with that.

I can be silly — This is how I express joy.

I am determined — If I say I’m going to do something, you can bet I’m going to do.

I am self-aware — I know myself, my passions, and my dreams. My life path may seem meandering or random, but I can assure you I’m not wandering aimlessly.

I crave love and approval — Sometimes this makes me do things that undermine my self. But I’m working on it.

I have a hard time getting my words out in difficult moments. That doesn’t mean I don’t know what to say. I just need to find a creative way to say it.

I am loving — I want the best for people. Truly.

I can be innocent and naive — I want to believe that people want the best for me as well. I know I have to keep this in check, but I also don’t want to relinquish it fully.

I am spiritual — Even though I don’t have a “system” through which I express this, there is a significant part of me that feels connected to everything around me, and longs to know the Hows and Whys of life.

I am scarred — And I’m a better person for it.

I am beautiful — There’s nothing I need to do to mask or enhance this.

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