Please Don’t Ask Me How Long This Will Take
How long will recovery take? An open letter to our Supporters, We had the fight again — the one that happens when our heroic patience finally deflates, and our frustration comes hissing out until it permeates through the house. You want to know: How long is this going to take? How long are we going to suffer like this? You are tired. You are trying your hardest and we are draining our resources, but nothing seems to do the trick. You don’t know if there is ever a “right thing” to say. Most of the time, you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, afraid that your well-intended comment is going...
Read MoreA Letter to “The View”: I Do Not Enjoy My Eating Disorder
To the hosts of ABC’s The View, On the Nov. 19 episode of The View, while discussing Donald Trump’s alleged weight loss, Joy Behar remarked that while backstage the hosts had debated whether it’s better to become anorexic or bulimic. Co-host Michelle Collins asked the crowd, “What do you girls think?” before promptly answering, “Definitely bulimic. You get to enjoy the meal.” An apology of sorts followed, with Candace Cameron Bure reassuring viewers that the discussion was meant in jest, and that she, as a recovered bulimic, was empathetic. “I think I can joke about it because I’ve been...
Read MoreThese are the Trenches Through Which Recovery Runs
An Eater’s Agreement Written for my EDTNY graduation on August 24 Sarah walked into our therapy session on Wednesday holding a 50-foot spool of yellow rope. Looking at her, I couldn’t imagine what one could possibly do with a rope that would be therapeutic. It turned out to be an exercise in boundaries. The idea was to use the rope to represent the boundaries I’ve created or would like to create. By the end, I’d discovered that when it comes to people, my boundaries are fairly permeable — a little too permeable sometimes. But that’s not actually the problematic one. My...
Read MoreA Letter From the Brink of Relapse
By Don Blackwell, author of Dear Ashley: A Father’s Reflections and Letters to His Daughter on Life, Love and Hope See this original post on EatingDisordersBlogs.com A Letter From the Brink of Relapse “Just eat for God’s sake, for your sake – for our sake!” Dear Mom, Dad, Husband, Brother, Sister, Friend, I know you’re frustrated and angry that I’m struggling – AGAIN! Believe me, I am too, but I’m also terribly afraid – afraid of slipping back into the quicksand of this insidious disease, afraid of the darkness that I know is waiting for me if it succeeds in pulling me back in, if it...
Read MoreAn Eater’s Agreement
Yesterday I turned 26. Being a pretty sentimental person, birthdays for me are always cause for reflection — I take stock of the last year, of the last decade, and of my life up to this point. I thought about where I was and what I was doing one year ago on my 25th birthday, just two months away from starting down the road to recovery (although I didn’t know that yet). I remember being on the train to Pennsylvania to visit my mother. I was reading the final pages of Carolyn Costin’s book 8 Keys to Recovery from an Eating Disorder. At the end of the book were examples from something Carolyn...
Read MoreNational Suicide Prevention Week: An Open Letter to a Survivor
This week is the 2014 National Suicide Prevention Week. Suicide is a topic that has been hitting home lately, having experienced three brushes with suicide among friends and acquaintances this year, two of which were successful. Suicide is a difficult topic to talk about, because it spotlights what most of us try to run from — our mortality. For me, trying to fathom the literally unimaginable moment I cease to exist brings up something akin to horror. To then grapple with the startling truth that we each have the capacity (and occasionally the impulse) to deliberately launch ourselves into...
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I'm a writer, a mental health activist, and a 20-something in recovery from an eating disorder. This blog chronicles my journey through the middle ground toward full recovery.
