I had an intense dream two nights ago.
Something bad had happened, although I’m not exactly sure what. I was sobbing, racked with grief. That’s what stands out most about the dream — the feeling of that grief, of sinking to the ground and sobbing loudly and violently and not knowing if I’d ever be able to stop crying.
It was everywhere, the grief — in my throat, my chest, my shoulders, my back, my knees. It was the word NO over and over again, the feeling that something I treasured had been irretrievably lost.
There were people around me. They were looking on, but not doing anything. It’s not that they were ignoring me; there simply was nothing that could be done. All they could do was stand and watch and let it happen.
They get stranger and stranger, my dreams, the deeper into recovery I go.
63 Days | 16 Hours | 24 Minutes | 26 Seconds
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