The Middle Ground Named Top Eating Disorder Blog of 2015
Well, THIS was quite surprising. This Sunday PsychCentral.com released its annual list of the Top Eating Disorder Blogs — and ranked The Middle Ground as No. 5 on the list! Needless to say, I’m pretty thrilled. Not because of the accolade per se — though, of course it always gratifying to be recognized for one’s hard work. I’m thrilled because it forces me to acknowledge something that I might not have done unsolicited: That I’ve succeeded in forging a new identity. For those of us who have suffered from an eating disorder for many years, one of the hardest parts of...
Read MoreRecovery Is Now
One Friday, about four weeks into residential treatment, I had a particularly bad day. In a moment of distress and vulnerability, I slipped up and used a behavior, which ended up costing me dearly in that very strict, “merit-based” treatment structure. My roommate and another friend rallied around me. That night, the three of us skipped the mandatory family group and camped out in our bedroom, hiding like truant teenagers from the counselors who came around to check that everyone was at the group. We sat on the floor between our beds and played cards, gossiping about our...
Read MoreThank You and Bear With Me!
Hello all. You might have noticed that I haven’t been writing as frequently as I normally do. I have not abandoned this blog! Quite the opposite, in fact — it’s amazing how this blog has become seamlessly incorporated into my life. Writing is never a chore or an obligation. It is simply my mode of being. However, I am also a writer in my professional life. (Which I consider myself very fortunate to be.) The spring months at my job are extraordinarily busy. In addition to the sharply increased workload, I’m taking courses for my graduate program. When I get home after work...
Read MoreWild Geese
Wild Geese By Mary Oliver You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees For a hundred miles through the desert repenting You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your...
Read MoreYour Secrets Keep You Sick
Okay… I guess have to write this post. It’s time I come clean about the fact that I’ve been struggling a lot lately. As I always say here, I wish I could be sunshine and smiles and recovery all the time, but that’s just not what the middle ground is. The middle ground is a labyrinth full of potholes and dead ends and roads that lead you in circles. But if there’s one path that’s guaranteed to take you to relapse, it’s the path of secrecy. I won’t say exactly what’s going on, because I try to avoid mention of specific behaviors, numbers,...
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I'm a writer, a mental health activist, and a 20-something in recovery from an eating disorder. This blog chronicles my journey through the middle ground toward full recovery.
